It is 2019 already, I hear you say ugh again a 2019 post. No, this post will be different this wil be personal, sad and happy!
I sit here on the couch with my brothers computer thinking about what 2018 for year was. 2018 has been a shitty year for me I mean really shitty. It started already rough because my dad really got sick and in March he passed away. I already lost my mum when I was 7 years old. So when my dad was gone I was al by myself , I needed to take care of my younger brother. Ofcourse I had help from my friends and dad his friends, but my family didn’t help us. So it was hard to be 21 years old and take care of everything.
Also on work it was really hard , I got in a really big but sad fight with my best friend, because of some misunderstandings.. I was in love with her , she was everything what was still good in my life. My other friends at work where there for my but also where friends with her, so it was hard to fit in. I remember the party’s we had. I wanted to make contact with her again sometimes it worked but sometimes not.
I will write more about our story in 2019. All I want to say for now about this is that we are good friends again we have talked things out, and for now it is good.
There were more shitty things but I want to turn to the good things 😀
As I already said I sit here on my couch, but not just on a couch , I sit at my couch in my own home, yes in 2018 , I bought my own place for me and my brother ! So we can start over and make happy moments!!!
What did I learn from 2018?
I learned that nothing is forever, the one time you have everything but in one eye blink it will be all gone. Then you need to say to yourself , get back up, try to life again! That is hard sometimes, but I know for myself that I can do it! I can be who I want to be. It needs time to heal, but I will and I will be stronger. I will learn erveryday. I will meet people , lose people , forget about people. But every person I will meet, will be a part of my life in some way. Love the once who will be there for you in good and bad times! I will that you remeber that last part. Because what I really learned this last year is that poeple will leave in bad times and that is theire choose. Then you know who really cares about you !!
I will not say I will forget about 2018 because I can’t I will Always remember 2018 as a bad year, but 2019 has started already good. I have this new blog and that will be a big adventure. Also I made myself a promise. I will enjoy the little things in life more.
So what will I do , enjoy, laugh or like more in 2019:
-I will not let others tell me how to feel or what to do.
-I will enjoy the cuddels I get from my dogs.
-I will tell people more about what they mean for me and that I care.
-I will enjoy small things like being with friends , going for a walk or jokes things like that the small happy things in life matter too.
-I will write more and let things go