I have found love for the first time. She is my first girlfriend. It all new for me and that is alright I need to learn how to love. I need to learn how it feels to be loved. But I love it. I love everything.
Also new for me is to be together out in public with her. We are both girls and for some people, this still can be an issue and that makes me sad but it’s the truth. In fact, I have experienced some homophobic comments for the first time in my life this weekend…
My girlfriend and I like to swim and of course, sometimes you get a little touchy because the two of you are in love. I always pay attention that it doesn’t become that sticky. We just hug we just give little kisses just like the straight people do. We just act like straight people do when they are in love. Im aware that people will stare I get used to it. It doesn’t matter when she’s with me I feel loved.
Things changed when we stood in line for the waterslide. My girlfriend and I were talking. I had my arm around her. She said something cute so I give her a little kiss. Suddenly I heard a man behind us “can we just act normal ” with an angry strict voice. I looked behind me. At first, I thought it was not about us. Until I saw the eyes of the man cross mine. He looked at us full of hate.
I can’t explain what I felt then so many mixed emotions went through my body… I went from angry to very emotional I wanted to confront him I wanted to run but most of all I felt sad and felt the tears fill up my eyes. I stood there and looked at him with tears in my eyes I, wanted him to know that he had hurt me. But he just continued to look me straight in the eye with anger.
My girlfriend talked to me. “Just ignore him, he is not worth it, let him be” She has experienced homophobic comments before so you can say she is “used” to it. I kept my arm around her. I heard the man say ” they are not listening, they are just not listening” he was talking to his children or at least I think they were. And all I can think of is. Why did he jell at us? Why? Nobody had a problem. We did nothing wrong. Why didn’t he just looked away and mind his own business? What if his daughter turned out to be gay what would he say then? It’s so sad…
Luckily we got out of this situation but I couldn’t enjoy myself anymore. Everywhere we swam I looked for him. Afraid that he would yell at us again. So my girlfriend asked me if I wanted to leave. And yes I wanted. He had ruined our swimming trip and it is sad that it had happened…
Luckily we sit had a good time when we left the swimming pool. So our day wasn’t completely ruined.
I got so emotional. And this was just words. I can’t imagine that people need to deal with a lot worse homophobic comments or even violence… it just so sad.
We acted normally. The only person who didn’t act normal was him. And I need to learn how to deal with those people so they can’t hurt me again.